Your history shouldn’t be an excuse to stay with someone when the relationship is going downhill. It doesn’t matter how well a person treated you in the past. It doesn’t matter how many warm and fuzzy memories you have with them. What matters is how they treat you today. What matters is whether you’re happy with them today.
Every relationship is going to have speedbumps. There are going to be arguments. There are going to be doubts. But there is a huge difference between going through a rough patch with someone and becoming a stranger to someone.
People change. Your partner isn’t going to be the same exact human as they were when you first met, but neither are you. However, you should be growing together, not growing apart. If you are no longer as happy as you once were, if you feel like you no longer make sense as a couple, then you’re allowed to walk away.
Some people are only meant to be temporary stops along your journey. They’re not meant to stay with you forever. There’s nothing wrong with walking away from someone who once meant the world to you. Maybe they still do. But you have to listen to your heart over your history. You have to do what is best for the future you, not the old you.
As much as it might hurt to walk away from someone who has been in your life for a long time, you aren’t doing yourself any favors by staying. You’re only putting off the inevitable. You’re only taking away your chance (and your person’s chance) to discover something new and exciting.
Remember, you don’t owe this person your heart, simply because you gave it to them years ago. Things change. Feelings change. If you want to leave, then you shouldn’t let anything stop you.
Having history with someone doesn’t mean you’re stuck with them forever. You can be thankful for what you went through in the past without wanting them in your future. You can look back on your memories with a smile, even if you aren’t interested in making any more memories.
You’re not the same person you were yesterday, so you don’t have to fulfill that person’s dreams. Fulfill your own dreams. Do whatever the current you desires. Forget about what you wanted in the past and focus on what you want right now. Ask yourself what would make you the happiest.
Whatever you do, don’t let your history with someone convince you to overstay your welcome. If you are ready to leave, then you’re allowed to go. You aren’t trapped in your current situation. You aren’t obligated to keep trying to fix what’s broken long after you realize the job is impossible.
Don’t feel guilty over doing what is best for yourself because, in the end, it will be best for the other person, too. You’ll both have the chance to grow without each other. You’ll have the opportunity to find the place where you really belong.