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Modern communication is all about emojis and texts, leading to a generation of carpal tunnel, thumb-twitching, forward-leaning, screen-tapping messengers who view phone calls as monstrous, unappealing chores.

There are pros and cons to this type of communication. The pros are that there’s really no “What did you just say?” type of action going on in whatever discourse you find yourself currently engaged in. If you want to know what someone just said, simply re-read the message.

You can also sneak messages in during movies, other conversations with people, or standing online somewhere, without the fear of someone else honing in on your conversation (unless they’re a rubber-necking creep) or having to hear what you’re saying.

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But the downside of texting is that you don’t know when people are being sarcastic or not — you’ve got no cues for tone. Like, I don’t know if someone is actually telling me they like the Point Break remake (whatever that is) or they’re ridiculing the film for the garbage it is. If it even existed, because, like I said, I don’t know what movie that is.

This fact of text communication has never been more true than when Twitter user @TommySobieski gathered up all of the most common replies that girls text back when they’re upset with you/done with you/mad at you. And they’re all spot on.

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Why does “honestly nevermind” send chills up and down my spine? And not the good kind. Holy moly that is some bone-chilling stuff. Have fun is a close second too, just because it has the word “fun” in it — pure sadism.

Despite Tommy’s excellent, comprehensive, and very important tweet regarding modern text-iquette going viral, some people did find that his list of replies had some room for improvement. Or room for tweaking, rather.

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There was this major distinction between “okay” and “ok.” Now this is where texting can actually sometimes tell you more than a phone call — by analyzing the different ways a word is spelled and considering the situation in which it’s used, you can tell a lot about how someone’s currently feeling.

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And what ended up happening was Tommy inadvertently started a massive thread on the nuances of the replies that girls use when responding to texts. Someone brought up the “K” that’ll shake anyone down to their core. If you’ve ever received a “K” (may God have mercy on your soul), then my heart goes out to you.

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It was unanimously agreed upon among pretty much everyone on the thread that being on the receiving end of this single letter is a nightmare scenario that should be avoided at all costs. But believe it or not, there’s something that’s even worse than getting “K.” Another variation is straight murder.

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Yes that’s right, the lowercase “k,” when combined with a period, is the most savage  “You done messed up now” indicators of text messaging anger, ever. If you thought the uppercase was bad, well, just know that any relationship is pretty much un-salvageable if you get the dreaded “k.”

But if you find yourself in any of these situations where you need to deal with one of these terse replies and dig yourself out of it, then do yourself a favor and refrain from using any of these replies.

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Ellena joined the fray and mapped out the typical responses that boys give right back to these texts. It’s a game of psychological textual warfare that doesn’t result in any victors, just a bunch of people who are constipated with anger and staring down at their phones.

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The best is when people decided to extend Tommy’s original list well beyond the first eight entries. As it turns out, there are tons of ways to tell someone that you’re done with them over text. They all share one thing in common though: They’re written nicely, but their curtness lets you know something is gravely wrong.

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Just reading these are giving me anxiety and having me check my phone nervously right now to re-read the texts I may have received from my wife. You know, just in case I did anything wrong. Because every time I do, texts are the first way I hear of it.

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Other runners-up include “Mhm,”http://undefined/”Im done,”http://undefined/”Im tired,”http://undefined/”Nothing,” and “No youre fine.” Again, these are all terrible, but I do think that there are some that are worse than others. A “nothing,” for example, is almost like an open invitation to un-mess up whatever you did to make that person angry in the first place.

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I think a lot of these miscommunications can be better handled if you just up and decide to call someone on the phone and hash out whatever problems you have in real-time, rather than waiting for follow-up messages that may or may not be passive-aggressive. But what do I know? I’m over 30 years old.


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