Cockroach ‘Milk’ Is Trending Again Because It’s Healthy But People Want It To Stop
There are some health trends that seem super gross but are ultimately good for you, so you act like an adult and begrudgingly try them out.
Like people’s unnatural obsession with kale.
But although kale has the uncanny ability to absolutely ruin any salad it touches, in my opinion, there are some health foods that take grossness to a whole other level: like incorporating “bug protein” into foods.
I know, it sounds nasty to eat insects and that’s because they are totally gross looking. Logically, it makes perfect sense to farm bugs and consume them for sustainability purposes. There are worm burgers currently being sold in Germany, and cricket protein cookies on shelves in supermarkets all over America, and they’re much cheaper to produce and pack just as much, if not more, nutrition than our current go-to protein sources.
But there’s something that somehow sounds even grosser than eating straight-up crickets and ground worms, believe it or not, and that disgusting food is cockroach milk.
People are trying to push this idea that ‘Cockroack Milk’ is a new health trend that we’re all getting obsessed over, but, it’s just not happening.
Sure, the ‘milk’ is actually crystals produced by a specific breed of cockroaches to feed their young.
So it’s not like people are going around and ‘milking’ cockroach boobies in order to get at the that sweet roach nectar.
And there are some people who are ready to try slurping on cockroach crystals because the health benefits are undeniable. It packs more than double the fat, sugar, and protein than other milk.
The scientific and nutrition community is, of course, interested by the news because, again, logically speaking this is a big, big deal with huge implications for everyone all over the world. World hunger could be affordably addressed if we cultivated cockroach crystals to produce low-cost sustenance for impoverished nations.
But it doesn’t mean that people aren’t very confused.
….how does one milk a cockroach, exactly? It’s not like it’s got mammary glands….
— Dr Mel Thomson (@DrMel_T) May 23, 2018
Even if they are finding the news fascinating.
the cockroaches make little nutritionally dense protein crystals and feed them to their young. :3
— wereoctopus (@wereoctopus) May 23, 2018
As it turns out, eating the crystals can exacerbate other issues, like inducing acne. Probably because your body is so disgusted it’s literally breaking out to stop you from eating cockroach secretions.
Cockroach milk = Crystalline protein secretions for larvae.
“there is evidence that shows that GH [in roaches] may exacerbate acne in certain individuals” – Dr. Nazarian
— Dustin Moore, MS, RD (@theamericanrd) May 23, 2018
Nevertheless the memes about cockroach milk already began rolling in.
“Honestly, I just think you aren’t drinking enough cockroach milk. If you really wanted that glow, you’d actually commit.”
— stephanie ruby (@rubyjnkie) May 23, 2018
Everyone was taking their shots at the nasty news.
Even throwing some shade at celebs:
My first thought when reading this article was: “Enough’s enough, Gwyneth Paltrow.”
— hil.i.am (@hilaryluros) May 23, 2018
It’s pretty obvious though that people just aren’t having it.
I mean how many individuals are out there running around, excited to drink cockroach milk?
Some people pointed out that there are plenty of plant milk alternatives, like pea milk.
I mean it could have some benefits.
But in the end, is it worth it?