The bar, the Merry Ploughboy in Rathfarnham, is a lively spot, popular with tourists and with plenty of live music on offer. The pub keeps its clientele in line with these ten – some sensible and some hilarious – rules.

Of course there are the rules that anyone in the bar trade will know, such as don’t get too rowdy at the bar, don’t ever click your fingers to get your server’s attention and so on, but our favorite on this list is number three:



Here’s the text, in case you want to take notes:
1. Buying someone a drink is five times better than a handshake.

2. If someone offers to buy you a drink, do not upgrade.
3. Persons drinking a pint of Guinness before it has fully settled will be immediately barred.

4. Anyone on stage or behind the bar is 50% better looking.

5. Telling lies is unacceptable, you may however grossly exaggerate.

6. If there is ever any confusion, the fuller beer is yours.

7. If you hesitate more than three seconds after getting the barman’s attention, you do not deserve a drink.

8. If you buy a woman a drink and she refuses, she does not like you.

9. If you buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still may not like you.

10. Girls hang out, apply make-up and have long talks in the bathroom. Men do not.