I remember when internet dating started gaining popularity and a huge social stigma arose toward people who had met their significant others online. After all, we’d just gotten over the “computers are for nerds HA HA” sentiments of the ’80s, so the thought of using consumer electronics for potential romantic connections still didn’t sit right with a lot of people.
Even if Tom Hanks was in a movie about pretty much just that.
It didn’t take long for dating sites (later, apps) to change the way people look for partners, and now, in 2018, if you’re not down with Tinder, Bumble, Grindr, OKCupid, PlentyOfFish, Coffee Meets Bagel, and all the other programs, then you’re probably just being an old-head.
And while I personally know people who ended up finding long-term partners and even spouses on Tinder, anyone who’s ever used a dating app knows just how exhausting, depressing, and insane the process can be.
And that’s because there’s an alarming number of people who just absolutely suck. Just ask any woman who’s ever used Tinder and they’ll tell you that. Or, take a look at some of these absolute gems on the Tinder Nightmares Instagram account.
The pick-up lines that some people try are just downright awful. But some of the comebacks are great.
Like how would anyone in their right mind think these are charming?
Is the thirst that real? Like, I get messaging someone and telling them they’re attractive, but damn.
There was this dude who thought he was slick.
These two must know each other.
The raunchy, “I think I’m clever” pick-up line struggle is very real.
Some Casanovas were undeterred.
While others thought that including emojis that could be perceived as self-deprecating would mask their attempt at being romantic.
Some of the one-liners didn’t even make any sense.
Whenever there’s a comeback good enough to piss someone off, an angel gets its wings.
To call some of these opening lines bizarre would be doing some of these guys a kindness.
I never understood how having someone call you “Daddy” would be a turn-on. It’s so weird.
At least this individual was consistent and didn’t get salty for not getting a response.
Uhh, thanks for the compliment, I guess?
Then you have people who start off relatively normally, until the creepiness rears its ugly head out of nowhere.
There are also those who don’t understand the concept of auto-complete.
Who knew such exceptional poets browsed Tinder?
There was this dude who had the right idea by offering pizza, but totally flubbed the rest.
Nothing says romance like, “I’ve got a terrible infection.”
There’s this man who claims that his love-making skills will transmogrify you into another person entirely.
Panera’s not the least sexy food to eat off someone’s body, but it’s definitely up there.
Bringing up farts? A bold strategy.
Some guys can’t be let down easy.
While others have some weird dinner plans in mind.
This rejoinder was on point.
Acronym switch-ups all daaaaay.
I think this guy misspelled “brain cell.”
Man I’m so happy I’m not online dating anymore.