So you’ve decided to have kids.

Gone are the days of spontaneously sweeping your partner off their feet and having a heated quickie on the couch. Now you’ve got to make sure junior is asleep or at a friend’s house and that wherever you’ve decided to do the deed has a door that locks.

Heaven forbid junior walked in and saw Mommy and Daddy “wrestling” among the bed sheets. However, despite their best intentions, some couples have had to deal with exactly that situation.

Here are the most hilarious stories of kids walking in on their parents having sex:

1. Kiss Kiss

“Seven-year-old grandson walked in on Mom and Dad two weeks ago. Dad tells him to get out. Grandson says he just wanted to give Mom a good morning kiss. Dad repeats ‘get out’. Mom comes out a few minutes later and grandson asks what Dad was doing.

“Mom says he was giving her a kiss. Grandson said, ‘I know what you were doing and it’s disgusting, and now I don’t want to kiss you good morning’.” (redeyedone)

2. A Private Moment

“I was pregnant, and my six-year-old (at that time) walked in on us. He immediately walked out and shut the door and my husband and I freaked out. I went downstairs and found him coloring at the kitchen table.

“I sat down and said, ‘You saw Daddy and me in a private moment and I just wanted to make sure–’ and he interrupted with, ‘When you were having sexual intercourse? That’s what it’s called, SEXUAL INTERCOURSE.’

“I was like, ‘Yes, and I just wanted to make sure you weren’t upset or scared or anything.’ He asked, ‘You mean because I saw you having SEXUAL INTERCOURSE?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘No…I’m not scared or upset. Why, were YOU scared or upset?’

“I said no. He said, ‘I’ll tell you what I thought. I was thinking, I wonder if she’ll get another baby in there and then we can have twin babies!’

“But then for like months after that, if anyone would say the word ‘private’ he would say, ‘Some people say private moment when they mean SEXUAL INTERCOURSE, which is a p*nis going into a v*gina, and it’s how babies get inside the Mom.'” (MarianneDashwood)

3. Mother’s Day

“Not a parent but I was the kid and it was horrid. Mother’s Day when I was fifteen. My parents’ bedroom had a bathroom and I needed something in it and opened the door looking at the ground at first. I took a few steps in before seeing them on the bed.

“My mother’s morbidly obese white naked body on top of my dad and my dad’s hands grabbing her a**. I felt my feet back pedal but I slipped and fell to the ground. I turned to my stomach and f**king crawled outta there slamming the door behind me.

“My mom told me my dad laughed and said it was a mothers day I wouldn’t forget.” [deleted user]

Ever pick a lock? this next kid has…

LEAVE A REPLY